Backstage Pass University Edition
Backstage Pass University Edition
Ep.3 -- How Do I Make Connections? : Networking, Community Building and Student Leadership
“I don’t know how to talk to professors” and “I don’t know how to network or make friends” are some of the questions we find ourselves asking as new students entering university. The thought of forming new relationships can be intimidating, and that makes total sense. It’s scary to think about going to a place with thousands of people and not knowing anyone.
Join Brianna and Sam as they break down the best networking techniques to create valuable connections and opportunities. Does all networking have to be in person? What does virtual networking look like? University student Lavarnan talks about how getting out of your comfort zone and connecting with others with shared interests can create spaces for advocacy and community building in physical and virtual environments.
Backstage Pass is funded by an eCampus Ontario Virtual Learning Strategy Grant, and is a collaboration between students, staff, and community members based at Ryerson University (Renaming in process) and York University.
Timestamps
01:44 Intro - Building Professional Relationships
03:42 Discussion - Networking Misconceptions and Looking Back to Our First Year
11:42 Getting Out of Your Comfort Zone and Student Leadership - Student Feature Lavarnan
18:23 Making Networking Less Intimidating - Tips and Tricks!
23:01 Closing Thoughts and Wrapping Up
Resources
Access the transcript and free eLearning modules HERE!
Episode Transcript
eLearning Module
Follow the Project
Follow the Backstage Pass Podcast through @RyersonSLLS on Instagram and Twitter!
Credits
Ryerson University (Renaming in process) Content Experts
Meera Govindasamy, Academic Engagement Specialist, Principal Investigator
Andrew Bisnauth, Manager, Student Life and Campus Engagement
York University Content Experts
Kayla Lascasas, New Student Transition Coordinator
Jair Kallidumbil, Manager, Student Life
Student Advisory Committee
Riya Bhatla
Micah Chu
Karanveer Khadra
Media Production Research Assistants
Samantha McNulty, co-host and technical producer
Brianna Roett, co-host and producer
Designers
Mariam Ahmed, Instructional Designer
Sally Goldberg Powell, Instructional Technologist
Erica Wu, Graphic Designer
Ali Aird, Project Manager
The included music and/or sound effects from Jamendo and Artlist are used with permission in this project, but the user is not free to remix the content containing music and/or sound effects, extract and use the music out of the context of the podcast or use the music or sound effects offline. All other material is licensed under an Ontario Commons License.1.0.
Please see this citation list for all sound effects and music used on the podcast.
Oh man, there's so many people in this class. Where do I sit? Everyone looks like they found their friends. Why do I have to be so awkward?
TV Announcer:Do you struggle to meet new people?
Student 1:Whoa.
TV Announcer:Find it hard to break out of your comfort zone?
Student 1:Yes.
TV Announcer:Feel like it's easier to just stay quiet and go home right after class?
Student 1:Yeah, actually,
TV Announcer:Well then you need the Friend Magnet!
Student 1:The friend what?
TV Announcer:The Friend Magnet! The Friend Magnet brings the friends right to you. Gone are the days of putting yourself out there trying new clubs or events. With the Friend Magnet, you can find people for your group project with the click of a button. Simply download the Friend Magnet app to your telephone device and watch the friends come to you. The Friend Magnet will find you people to swap notes with, people that have similar interests and will eat lunch with you, and people to share your success with other than your mom! So the next time your prof calls out a breakout room, you can go in ready to connect with the Friend Magnet.
Brianna:There's no such thing as the friend magnet.
Sam:But sometimes we wish there was.
Brianna:Making friends and finding connections can be an intimidating process. But that doesn't mean it's impossible or not worth trying.
Sam:having relationships with our peers profs and colleagues can help us feel supported and inspired.
Brianna:This episode we're talking about networking and community building at university.
Funding Partner Announcement:This podcast has been funded by the eCampus Ontario virtual learning strategy grants.
Brianna:Hello listeners I'm Brianna Roett and I will be your host throughout this miniseries.
Sam:And I'm Sam your co host and welcome to The Backstage Pass Podcast.
Brianna:Made in conjunction with two Toronto universities, our goal for The Backstage Pass Podcast project is to shed light on the university experience so that prospective students from Ontario who belong to equity deserving groups feel prepared with the skills and resources that can make going to university feel like a possibility.
Sam:In this podcast series you'll be hearing from a variety of people in the education system from university students to academic experts, as well as some of you. We want to hear from other prospective students on their thoughts, feelings and fears about attending university.
Brianna:Backstage Pass also includes a range of resources to support you depending on how much you want to learn and how you like to learn. First, we have four audio podcast episodes like this one.
Sam:We also have free elearning modules that go into detail about the issues discussed on the podcast and will provide you with an overview of how things like money networking and study skills work at the university level.
Brianna:This episode we're talking about relationships, not the romantic kind, but academic and professional ones. Finding community is an important part of the university experience. It helps us feel like we belong and allows us to explore opportunities, develop new interests and goals.
Sam:The thought of forming new relationships can be intimidating. And that makes total sense. It's scary to think about going to a place with thousands of people and not knowing anyone. Thoughts like,"I don't know how to talk to professors", "I'm not like other students", and "I don't know how to network or make friends" can come up when we start to think about going to university.
Brianna:There's also something about the concept of networking that can feel elite, like you're trying to get in on a secret society of people who wear suits all the time, have money, study business or law, or know how to talk in a certain way. But really, networking is just about building relationships that ideally will lead to new opportunities.
Sam:Building new connections with other students and peers requires seeking out smaller pre existing networks. It's usually easier to make friends within a group of 10 people than it is in a lecture hall filled with 300 students. Seeking out different groups, events, networks and resources that might connect you to the types of people you want to know are a great way to start, but will always involve some exploration and experimentation.
Brianna:And remember, almost everyone around you is going through a similar situation. They're also anxious, maybe insecure and looking for people to connect with as well. So Sam, did you know anybody going into your program? Were you all alone? How did you feel? And were you nervous about making friends?
Sam:Um, I think I was just pretty stuck up. I had a big ego coming in to school, I thought I was all that because like, I went to university originally to study journalism. And then for there, I was pretty shy and I was kind of sad because I was in a long distance relationship, and that was no fun. But then when I dropped out of that program and came to the current university that I'm at, I felt like I kind of had this like chip on my shoulder and that I was kind of better than people who were already there because I said like, "Oh, I've already been to university. So like I got this. I don't want to be around all of these people straight out of high school". So I definitely isolated myself within the first year, and I kind of just stuck to my partner, and maybe just a few people that like were around me in classes, but for the most part, I thought I was smarter than everybody else, which is not a good, not a good vibe. But probably by the second year is where I started making friends, because I just started talking to people in my classes more and had more group projects to get to know them, and just had a little bit more faith in the people around me.
Brianna:I think that's very funny because I was quite the opposite. When I went to the open house for my, for the university I go to, I was so overwhelmed and so intimidated by what everybody had going on. I felt like I didn't know anything, and everybody in the room was smarter than me. And I think that caused me to isolate, specifically in my first year, just because I didn't know if people even wanted to speak to me or make connections with me. And I think a lot of that was just my own nerves and me being a little bit insecure. And that's a totally normal feeling. So I think it's very interesting. Very two different perspectives on coming into university and making friends. But I mean, you talked about meeting people in class, but were there any other places clubs or anything like that, where you really like found a community that you clicked with?
Sam:Yeah, like sometimes I would volunteer to put on kind of like a lecture talk or go to a guest event. And I might have been there to like set up audio. And that's kind of how I started meeting people who were also interested in audio and were in my program, and just talking to them before the guests even got there or during setup or putting things away. That's what I started to open up to people and say, like, "hey, these people are actually competent. I like hanging out with you." So but yeah, definitely looking back, that kind of cruddy attitude I had at the beginning, I now see how that would have been how it isolated myself and how it isolated people like you Brianna.
Brianna:I mean, it can be very easy to put yourself in a box, especially when you're around hundreds of people in a lecture room, it can be very, like I'm one tiny fish in this giant ocean of a lecture hall. So it's super easy to isolate yourself. But especially in university, I think it's important to make any type of community, even if it's just two people that you like, talk to and share notes with. Like, I know for me last semester, I made a resolution or a goal for myself to make a new friend in every single class and, like not like a bestie, but just somebody that I could be like, "hey, like, how was the lecture?", "Hey, do you need help with like any project or anything", just to kind of make those connections. Because stuff happens. Sometimes you can't always be present in schoo. Things come up. And you might need a person to rely on or be like, "Hey, what happened in lectures or anything important? I need to know". So if it makes you uncomfortable, sometimes it's just having a backup of information or somebody you can talk to for those things. Were there any misconceptions you had about networking? Because I know we said before, it can feel kind of like this elitist process, like you're trying to get to the top, but it can be very overwhelming sometimes.
Sam:Yeah, no, I definitely felt like I had to dress very professionally and go and shake people's hands, which I was nervous for. Because I have sweaty hands and that's not a good, that's not a good look for anybody. So I was always kind of nervous about this whole idea of networking. And I felt like you know what, I'm just so shy, which makes no sense because I had such a big ego, but I was just so shy, that I didn't really want to talk to anybody, professionally, because I didn't know what I wanted to do. So how am I going to advertise myself to other people, if I don't even you know, have my stuff together? But once I started, just seeing the results of my actions and just interacting with people in my program and interacting with people at events, just starting up friendly conversations, I realized, oh, that's what networking is. It's just making friends wherever you go. And if you just have a genuine interest in somebody or are just friendly with them, people remember that. And if you're in a creative field, like mine, or something very practical, people might just call you up and say like, Hey, we met here. And I remember you talking about this and you're interested in this. I was wondering if you wanted to jump on this project. And it's kind of as simple as that. Or sometimes it's just referring people, to other people. So if you know a friend who's really into graphic design, or does research in a particular field, and you hear about another project that might interest them, just connecting them to that project, or the people who would be able to help them out that's also networking.
Brianna:A 100%. And I think sometimes people confuse networking with like a job interview. Like they're not the same thing. The idea of like dressing professionally and knowing 100% what you what you want and what you're good at. It's not always like that sometimes, networking could just be like following somebody on Instagram that has a similar interest as you or has worked on a project that you know of or you like or just genuinely like, appreciate. It doesn't have to be as formal as everyone makes it out to be. And obviously, there are some situations where networking can be a little bit more formal. For example, if you apply for a program or you are looking for job prospects, then maybe those can be a little bit more formal. But yeah, at the end of the day, as long as you're making connections that actually feel good to you, or you know, that might benefit you, then that's networking and that's good enough.
Sam:I love that you pointed out that it doesn't have to take place in person like that whole idea of following somebody on Instagram or even just connecting in a group chat for a course or you know being on a discord channel about a subject or you know, class that you're in. It's all networking once you start talking.
Brianna:Discord is great. Ten out of ten would recommend discord. It's a great place for if you're an introvert, or you just want to meet people and in person isn't for you, which is totally understandable in the world we live in. Discord can be such a helpful resource especially I know some professors now are like making their own attempts to make discord chats for the groups or for groups of students, which I really appreciate because it's just like put us all in a room let us figure it out. And that's also a great networking tool.
Sam:Discord's great. That's where I find my people. You can be so extra. You can be sending memes, but also be like commenting on somebody's like romantic life advice.
Brianna:Discord's great.
Sam:Discord's just a vibe.
Brianna:When it comes to networking, you're likely not starting from scratch, you already have a network and it's probably bigger than you think. Online, your network can be made up of people like your Instagram followers, Discord channel members, and even anyone you've communicated with through email, text, Snapchat, and other direct messaging platforms,
Sam:In person or in real life, our networks consist of people we've interacted with in the past, or people we currently know. These people are probably played a variety of roles in your life, such as your relatives, friends, previous teachers, co workers, members of your spiritual community, and even your hairdresser.
Brianna:However, loosely, you're connected to these people, you are connected, and so they're in your network. As a practice, networking is all about identifying the connection you currently have, continuing to develop new connections, and thinking creatively about how these relationships can support your personal and professional growth.
Sam:Finding people with similar interests, passions, or life experiences can be really rewarding. Let's hear from Lavarnan, a first generation disabled student who was able to make a difference in his community and develop some really cool skills because of networking.
Lavarnan:Community Building is definitely a huge thing for me, I would say that just I guess, even like in the basic sense, just emotionally speaking, you want to have those people that you can relate to. The people who, it sounds funny to say, but the people who will struggle with you, during midterm season exam season, it's like everyone's in the same boat really, more or less. And so just having people who you could say, Yeah, you know, I'm not the only one going through this, is definitely a huge push in the right direction, as well as just building that network for future careers and just exposing yourself to different opportunities. Like you need to confront and acknowledge that fear of meeting somebody that you've never talked to before. Whether it's a professor or a program director or just somebody in your class, you need to, you know, accept that the fact that you've never spoken with this person before, but the same time, they will probably be willing to talk to you. And so my first step in that regard was going to networking events. Like I said, I'm an introvert, it was probably the most nerve wracking and terrifying thing I've ever done in university, just sitting there in a room with a bunch of career professionals and asking questions. And the first one I went to, I didn't even ask any questions like I just sat there. As soon as they said, Thank you, I was gone, I left. But I went back again, like a week after to a different one. And again, I did it again and again and again. And through that I met with professors, I met with the wonderful staff of the Career and Co Op center. I met with counselors, I've met with just other students and eventually I made my way into those discord servers that were student related. So a recent thing with Discord is that they have student hubs. And so any student from Ryerson can join a student hub and they'll have access to all these different whether it's course discords or student group discords, anything like that. And so, as you can tell, I'm a big advocate for discord. I love discord. But no, I think there's definitely a lot of avenues in which you can go about it, whether it's through Instagram, which I've been starting to use a lot more recently.
Brianna:I guess a lot of the time students think that networking has to be the super serious. You know, you have to sit down in a meeting and like pose specific questions. And I mean, you've been talking about this a little bit, but like, does networking have to be that formal and serious?
Lavarnan:No way at all. Absolutely not. I went into networking with the exact same mindset. The first networking event, like I mentioned, I was honestly debating if I should bring a suit and tie, like, it's, it's not that bad, you can go in a sweater, you can go in like sweatpants. Honestly, I would say in terms of networking, is to be open minded, and don't be afraid to reach out to people. Because university is that environment where you meet so many people, even in just like a day to day basis, you meet so many new people, and you get exposed to so many different opportunities and experiences that you should just be open minded and willing to take on those opportunities. And because of that, I've been able to be a part of committees in which I'm able to have my disability be a position of active voice. And so example this would be one time I was actually late for class. It's a weird, it's a weird story. But I was late for class, because Ryerson doesn't exactly have the best elevator or like maintenance services. So their elevators tend to be down for about 90% of the year. So I ended up kind of ranting slash talking to a professor about that, because she knew I was like, pretty hard working in her course. And that it was weird to see me show up late. And so what happened was, I would take a huge detour around campus just to get to class because it's on a second floor. And so I had to go through multiple buildings. And yeah, it was a whole thing. But because of that connection, I was able to join the what I believe it's called the teaching and learning spaces working committee. And so what they do is they renovate classrooms, and tailor it more to I guess, you could say, a modernized space. And so I'm a both a undergraduate representative, as well as an accessibility advocate. So I would, yeah, I would basically advocate for things like better sightlines, having more mobility for students with wheelchairs and walkers, and just having spaces so that it isn't as congested and, you know, crowded, so that people with disabilities can feel just as welcomed as any other student in the classroom setting. I guess my takeaway from all that would be networking and just being involved in the community would honestly be more important than just attending university for your coursework and for your academic success. Because once you graduate within a couple of years, you're not going to retain all that information, but you still retain those networks, you still retain those connections that you've made. And that's so so important that students kind of take for granted in the first year. At the end of day, you're going to realize professors are people too, you know. And the same can be said about like HR recruiters and job seekers and all that everyone has- they're all people. And so they want to make those connections, they want to meet those people, they want to have those like personal experiences. So yeah, there is some professionalism involved, for sure, in some cases, but for the most part, you can be casual about it and people are very receptive of it.
Brianna:As you've heard from the Lavarnan finding community and building your network can take many forms, whether it be through participating in student led chats on Discord, getting involved in extracurricular activities, or even just talking to people in your class. Students often feel a sense of self empowerment and a strong connection to their communities, helping them to feel involved in our studies and industries.
Sam:As wewrap up here, I'm curious Brianna, what do you do to make the process of networking less intimidating?
Brianna:Well, for me, personally, I know I start with other students. Just because I feel like we're all at the same academic level, there's not a lot of ego at play most of the time. It can be a little bit intimidating when you're networking with teachers or professionals in an industry, for example. So I find just talking to other students, seeing who their connections are, or if they have connections to people, maybe higher up in the field that you want to be in, or in a project you want to participate in. I think it just keeps it on the same playing field, talking to other students and like making friends, because a lot of the times especially if you make a really good connection, that professional aspect may lead into like an actual friendship or somebody you just get along with and who doesn't need that in their life. Right.
Sam:I love that you brought up making friends because for me, it was all about developing mutually beneficial connections with others. So whether it was like sending notes of congratulations or like, you know, genuine appreciation to people that you know about projects that they're currently doing, or promotions that they've had. Essentially you just want to do things because you like the person, not because you're thinking you're going to get something out of it. Because when you do it with this idea that you're going to get something out of it, or you're going to get a job out of this person, it feels almost shallow. So...
Brianna:Well, like I think, actually, our friendship is a pretty good example of just kind of like networking. We both applied to the same job, we both got hired. But like, I think you have so much knowledge, you've given me so much information that is just beneficial for my career and in school and stuff. And like, I could see myself doing more projects with you outside of this. So I think that this is a really good example of just like, you know, you meet somebody randomly or casually because of a situation, you network and then like you make a connection that's actually beneficial. And like you make a friend, so that's cute right?
Sam:Yeah, honestly, work friends are the best friends. Because you just like, whether you have a shared trauma of just like, the work was not so great, or you have like a work experience like ours, and our work environment is amazing. You just develop friends that way. And you discover like, Hey, these are my people, and this is who I'd like to work with in the future. So I'm so glad you called me your friend, like I feel so complimented
Brianna:Yeah! Work friends
Sam:This has been a good day.
Brianna:We've never met each other in person. This has been a strictly like online friendship. But it's been, it's been great. I've had so much fun working with you. I don't know if that was off topic. But-
Sam:I don't think that was off topic.
Brianna:Work friends, networking, work friends, it's all related.
Sam:I recently had a conversation with my partner's dad about this. And we kind of had this like disagreement where I was talking about networking and talking about the concept of just making friends. And he was talking about how you know what, you just have to look at networking as stepping stones to opportunities. And I took it very much as this idea of like, oh, you're stepping on people this very, you know, white collar, elite type of thing, but he didn't necessarily mean it in that way. He meant it more like you're doing it to find a support network. And you're looking for people who are going to support you to get to places that you want to be in. So yeah, if you're going to go into networking with this idea that you're going to use people to get what you want, then, you know, this idea of being in a suits and this elitist society comes about. But when you're doing that, it can feel really intimidating, because if that doesn't come naturally to you, it becomes very exhausting. And it's almost like you're performing. And over the long term, it might not be something that you want to do, and it might deter you from making further connections. But again, like if you look at it, like making friendships, and being nice to people, and being around people that you genuinely enjoy being around, then it feels more natural and rewarding that way. And if you're nice to people, generally, they're going to be nice to you back. And if you're not somebody who's super outgoing, you can think of it as just being on good terms with people around you. Don't burn any bridges. Don't be like first year Sam and have a big ego. Because that's not good. It's not going to get you anywhere. It's a lonely life.
Brianna:Oh my god. I love that. Don't be mean. Moral of the story, don't be mean. Okay, I think that's a good note to end off on. If there's anything we hope listeners take away from this episode is that it's never too late to make new connections and get involved in initiatives or projects that interest you. If you don't see yourself represented in a specific community, then it's also totally okay to make your own. If there's something that you're passionate about, something you want to speak on, make that room for yourself. You deserve to take up space, you deserve to have your ideas heard and 99% of the time, if you have an idea, or there's something that you're passionate about, there's probably going to be a couple other people who are passionate about it as well. So yeah, you can be a leader in your own sense. Sometimes it's not about finding the perfect connections to get you to where you want to go. Sometimes you could just say this is where I want to be, and make that space for yourself. Leadership and initiative is good for networking as well.
Sam:For tips and tricks on other networking topics like talking to professors, using career resources and leadership, check out the Backstage Pass eLearning module that goes with this episode. Link to that is in our show notes.
Brianna:Next episode we're going to be discussing time management and study skills so make sure to keep on listening. In the meantime, if you want to check out either Sam or myself follow the project on social media and access the transcription of this episode, which you can find the links in our show notes.
Sam:Thanks so much for listening. This has been Backstage Pass with myself, Sam McNulty and Brianna Roett.
